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Oh, the holidays! Friends and family have all come together to celebrate with food, joy, harmony, music, all that stuff... but what you’re looking forward to is THE PRESENTS.
But at the end of the day, who’s really the ultimate gift giver? Who knows you better than anyone? Who can hold up that perfect thing that speaks to your heart and the very fiber of your being in this crazy world?
Here’s how to give that special someone in your life (yourself) a beautiful, meticulously wrapped gift (dope joint).
First, lay out everything you need.
The perfect joint has well-ground flower and smokes evenly the whole way through. Use a metal, plastic, or wooden grinder – they all have their pros and cons, so go with whatever you prefer. Don’t get your fingers all sticky by pulling your nugs apart by hand. Pull buds off the main stem and grind it good!
If you’re using a cardboard tip or crutch, get it into the right shape. The best method is to fold a small “W” at one end, then roll the other end around it in a tube shape. Then pick up your paper (glue side facing up) and drop your rolled tip right in the crease at the end.
Dump your ground flower onto your rolling tray or take it straight from the grinder barrel – again, up to what you prefer. Pick up your rolling paper by placing your index finger in the crease while holding the outside with your thumb and middle finger. With your free hand, delicately place pinches of flower into the paper crease and evenly spread it out.
You should have a little folded envelope of ground flower in your hands with a crutch at the end. Pinch this with both thumbs and index fingers underneath the flower and gently roll it up and down to form the flower into a tube shape (think back to rolling playdough into a small snake). When the shape feels good, pinch it shut tight and slide the paper down against itself so the glue side sticks up on top and the glue-less side is holding your flower in place.
Put that tongue to work and gently moisten the glue on your paper. Don’t overdo it, nobody likes a soggy joint, and your glue might fail anyway. Once it’s moist (sorry), roll the joint upwards to meet it and fold the glue side down to seal it.
Using your little packing tool, push in on the open (tipless) side of the joint and pack the flower tight. You probably have some shake left over, so sprinkle that in and pack it tight as well. Now give your paper a little twist to close it off and hooray! You’ve rolled the perfect joint.
Practice makes perfect, so don’t feel bad about tearing it open and starting over if you’re not happy with the results. On the plus side, your flower will already be in a nice tube shape for round two!
When you’ve mastered the technique, you’ll have a gift wrapped so perfectly that the only person you’ll want to give it to is yourself anyway. It may look absolutely beautiful, but as always, it’s what’s inside that counts! So find your favorite flower and get rolling!
Pro tip: Skip the grinding and buy Float Ground Flower instead!
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